This sucks.

We're not leaving.

We have to stay here FOREVER.

We play in the backyard a lot, but I get bored sometimes and dig holes & Louise yells at me. We have to keep our collars on all the time, even indoors, because a couple of times I've run out to explore around the neighborhood and Thelma has gone outside calling me and Louise has driven around looking for me and when she finds me she yanks me inside the car and Thelma gets so scared and worried that she cries. That happened just once. (The other times, Thelma was at work.) They keep saying I'm going to run outside and get LOST and that's the scariest thing that could ever happen. I don't want to get lost; I just want to know what's fun to do around here! Where are all the friendly doggies??